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Newcastle vs. Aston Villa, Preview: Please, Stop Mentioning 6-0

New Villa fundraiser: How much would you pay to kick Stephen Warnock in the arse?

Some questions we'll just never know the answer to: Why does Emile Heskey get so much playing time? Why did the BBC revamp their football site into something entirely unusable? And why do Aston Villa and Newcastle always play the early match on Sunday?

Another fun question to answer: Why is the Newcastle - Villa preview so damn late? Sorry, guys, but the answer is simply that I am terribly lazy and was hoping someone else could write it. But after a break yesterday in which I didn't watch one minute of football, I'm feeling itchy, ready for a return of the Villa.

Star-divide

We've already talked about how, although the QPR result was disappointing, for the most part, the team played well. Same with the Arsenal match. If the Villa could just stop having major defensive meltdowns -- for these are not errors, but meltdowns -- they might actually pick up some points.

One reason to be optimistic: The BBC notes that Villa have recovered a league-high 11 points from losing positions this season -- contrast that with last season, where the team was doing the exact opposite. Of course, there's also that matter of 6-0 hanging over the team's head. Will it work in the Villa favor?

In some not so good news, it seems Papiss Cisse will be handed his Newcastle debut on Sunday, having just returned from the Africa Cup of Nations with Senegal. Yes, because Villa really seem to like players with the last name "Cisse" who are debuting against the claret and blues. Demba Ba is also back. Oh yay!

On the Villa side, Marc Albrighton is still out with injury (boooooooo) while James Collins continues to struggle with an "ankle problem." Or perhaps just a "being terrible at defense" problem. That should mean we'll see Carlos Cuellar in the center of defense, but something tells me that unless Stephen Warnock gets hit by a meteor, he'll continue to be at left-back. Sigh. Oh, and Gabby Agbonlahor's likely out, too. Double sigh.

But we have Robbie Keane! And for once, I'm not being sarcastic!

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