When I was a child, I remember wondering why homeless people would wander across busy streets, with little regard for oncoming traffic. It was later explained to me that these people had nothing to lose, and therefore were completely unbound to the norms of rational civilization.

Karl Henry Has Been Suspended For Three Matches is probably best known for injuring or attempting to injure most of your favourite footballers. Karl Henry Has Been Suspended For Three Matches formally retired from playing football two seasons ago, but still shows up every week because he likes to hurt people.

When reached for a quote, Alan Hutton said "I'm thrilled someone else will be coming in to help me shoulder this burden. Injuring footballers is a thankless task, but a man's gotta put food on his table."